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hello Shweta, It was good to see you the other night I’d like to reiterate my offer to pass this house along when Matt & I vacate. In turn, if I might, I’ll take you up on your offer (how nice of you!) to help start a garden. How about it? Cheers, Dawson 9103225853
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3/3/11, 7:28 PM
Shweta

yes, it was good to see you as well! thanks so much for agreeing to save the house for us. i hope that will work out. and definitely, i would love to garden. planting season is approaching fast. there’s a mardi gras party/gathering/potluck out in the country (saxapahaw) this tuesday hosted by good friends of mine and parker’s – you and matt are welcome to come if you’d like. the address and details are on the event page i’ve invited you to.
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3/9/11, 3:55 PM
Shweta

hey, thanks for driving out to the gathering, dawson! you were awesome company, and you were very generous and kind to bring bread/goat cheese/and the two wines/thomas wolfe. i hope you enjoyed it – it seemed like you assimilated very naturally to the group, despite not knowing anyone there except parker and me (which brings to mind the fact that i was a tipsy and distracted host for you – so sorry about that!). if there are future events like this, i hope you’ll be able to attend.
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7/6/11, 9:43 PM
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Hi Shweta, I’d really love to come to the show tomorrow, but am not sure if I can; I’m in Wilmington at present. How are y’all planning the musical lineup? Any chance I could join the band, play a few songs, read some poetry? Will be making every effort to attend
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Hey Dawson — I think Parker and company will be starting at 7 PM (but the timing is sort of informal), and he’ll have around 30 minutes on the stage to share with company. So far only a rapper named E.T. is joining Parker, and they’ll do a few duos. YOU should definitely come if you can, and you’d be totally welcome to play songs. It’s more of a musical event, I think, so guitar and melody would suit the event more than reading poetry, although if you had a very short poem I think that might work too. YAY. I look forward to seeing you. Hopefully!
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8/13/11, 2:53 PM
Shweta

hey dawson, i apologize for the things i said last night about the psychological resilience or lack thereof of men versus women reared in extremely traumatic environments, and my experiences with most men like that, and my assumptions about the psychological struggles of our mutual friend. when i speak about people’s minds, i may sound ruthless or judgmental, but it doesn’t reflect how i feel about that person — i sympathize and respect everyone including all our friends re: their individual life stories and their identities and struggles. my statements regarding that are detached and curious. i still consider myself et al friendly acquaintances, and i hope you remain friends with me and parker. you are awesome. and maybe we can find time off to visit wilmington. sincerely, shweta
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10/22/13, 6:02 PM
Shweta

Dawson, John was quite late – a week plus, maybe two weeks – in giving us the green squash we bought. He gave us yours to safe keep as well, so let us know when we can meet.
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1/14/17, 9:11 PM
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Hey shweta, happy new year! I hope this note finds you well, and that you’ve kept faith, on some level, to the utopian promise of writing and journalism (if I can put it like that). Would enjoy knowing how you are, of course, regardless of whether you’re writing anything, but at the moment thoughts of periodicals and pubic affairs are are crowding my head, so there you go. Take care and look forward to hearing from you.
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Also, if you’re feeling adventurous
http://www.dawsongage.net/

www.dawsongage.net – “The problem is not in the implementation or communication of the system, the flaw is the system itself.” –S.E.G. / “Without knowing the force of words, it is impossible to know men.’ –Confucius (不知言、無以知人也

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you are of course well familiar with such things as unfinished websites, but it is what it is.
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1/14/17, 9:35 PM
Shweta

Hi Dawson! Thank you for your message and well wishes! I hope you’re doing well, sounds like brewing a storm of creativity and productivity, which is the most excellent news and also inspiring! I have just been beginning to consider those pursuits again myself. Is this an incipient blog? It looks exciting. I will read it when I get to my computer today! Give Parker and me a call sometime if you’re in town! A lot of changes here. (919) 291-1212
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8/17/17, 2:05 AM
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Hey Swheta, how are you?
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Shweta*
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Hey! I’m ok! A little overwhelmed by national news. How are you? I gather bad things about Wilmington democratic politics – they sound like bullies in a frat
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Well, I’m not sure who the bullies would be. I just feel completely isolated, I cannot tell who I might have upset/offended/disrespected or what have you, and moreover I cannot tell who might be actively trying to defame me where I cannot respond or defend myself
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I basically just get the sense that more and more people have decided I am not worthy of hearing their honest opinion, and that they’ve decided I deserve to be the last one to know when something decisively bad will be visited on me
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I really hope I’m just being paranoid, but it’s a tough spot, for the moment.
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Parker talked to me the other day and sounded kind of uneasy, said you and Tolliver had gone to the mountains? Are y’all doing OK?
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I hope it is, in any case. Sorry to bother you.
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Oh I am sorry to hear events have unfolded to lead to your feeling isolated!!! That is not a fun feeling. I think a lot of earnest and impassioned and nonmarketed expression is not given due credit or worthy channels. I also know social media is isolating – an artist shouldn’t gage (no pun intended) their worthiness by the attention received or not received there. It can be hard to practice solitude these days with all the clamor and clickbait beguiling us from the social media realm, but I find my happiness when I do practice solitude/reading/being among real communities. All is ok with us. Parker probably was just stressed about Bitcoin work, but he’s been feeling good(et) lately
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From my person experience there’s a lot of loneliness and unease all around these days. I attribute it to media and social media consumption
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I’m not sure when next Wilmington visit for Ping’s Tibet or otherwise might be but would like to rendezvous them again, same if you visit this place. I enjoyed reading one of your essays recently – about nuclear weapons and MLK and Wilmington. I think you should start your own publication, but I know that can be hard – i have failed at an attempt once. Do you know about Scalawag?
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Shweta
https://www.scalawagmagazine.org
You might find it a good publication to link up with for freelancing

Scalawag – Reckoning with the South

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Your voice should be heard by a large audience, my opinion
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8/17/17, 2:52 AM
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I have heard of Scalawag, thanks for your words of encouragement. I’ve got a lot of good ideas going for me, but at the moment I’m in a funk. Tomorrow’s another day however
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8/21/17, 3:11 AM
Shweta

We might be headed through Wilmington tomorrow (technically today – Monday). Will call or text!
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8/21/17, 1:20 PM
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Let me know let’s watch eclipse.
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8/21/17, 2:07 PM
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I have 4 pairs of glasses
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8/22/17, 12:56 AM
Shweta

Sorry to miss you during eclipse Dawson, brother/in laws/Parker/Tolly/critters/I had prior plan to road trip to SC for eclipse – a ton of traffic the whole way and was hectic and my communications systems were variously frazzled. We were gonna go stop in Wilmington tmrw on way home if you are free for coffee? Let us know parker is 919-291-1212, me 919-302-1282
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10/5/17, 8:00 PM
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Hey Shweta, how are you?
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10/5/17, 11:30 PM
Shweta

Hey! Tired but hanging in there. How’s it going?
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10/6/17, 4:26 PM
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Things are pretty complicated.
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10/6/17, 6:36 PM
Shweta
Sorry to hear. Give Parker a ring if you need an ear? 919-291-1212
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What is complicated – and do you want to re-route/simplify or fight the complications?
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10/6/17, 7:11 PM
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Well I got committed again by my parents and was held for 11 days and only got released because of a technicality that I had noticed after the first time when I studied it but my court appointed lawyer was super fucking sharp and spotted it so they didn’t judge had no choice but to dismiss the order still took a while to actually get released. On the plus side it’s hard to dispute the fact that I’m basically a political dissident being oppressed by psychiatry.
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Getting out felt miraculously good.
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10/6/17, 7:53 PM
Shweta

I’m glad you got out. Sorry your parents did that – and moreover you have the young democrats clique passive-aggressing you. What basis did your parents have to do that??? Or think they have? Seems like a toxic social environment, Dawson. Not healthy. No one could feel good or be well with that kind of lack of support and undermining. IMO would be wisest to get out of there or at least move elsewhere in town and draw boundaries around your psyche by not dwelling on or following these people for a long time. Rechannel your attention to something that serves you, for your own preservation and good health. Some newsletter more aligned with your vision, project that brings you credit you deserve, with people in your team. When you get affirmed there and gain more strength/steam, perhaps you can choose to tie up loose ends in the toxic zone if you still feel like it.
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Staying mired in such a situation can only hurt and wear a person down. Ive seen it time and time again. I’ve witnessed it. Best long term strategy for triumph is caring for yourself while you are down, not shouting at a deaf, obstinate, bigoted wall. Not being in a place where they can continue to marginalize and gaslight you and make you question your own heart and mind at some level (and ultimately if you stay there long enough at more and more levels). Instead seek to be in a good community or at least at first away from the saboteurs.
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Thanks for the cheerful words, you’re right on the mark.

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Take care of yourself spiritually, emotionally, psychologically, physically and intellectually. That is the only important thing right now. Let other people deal with their own mess in the meantime – you can’t and shouldn’t fix them or their ways, it’s futile right now. Then, the way people work, more people may join the bandwagon of friendship, you’ll feel better, ears will become more receptive. Have faith people will then listen in due time.
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Recovering from distress/trauma – Routines help. Exercise regimens. Regulating circadian rhythm. Breaking from screens to be in nature. Reading good fiction. Temporarily extricating yourself from any extraneous substances. Eating well and regularly, h20, vitamins. Minimizing alcohol and cigs and ultimately (at this juncture) destabilizing chemicals. Self-care sounds indulgent but actually vital for self-preservation and personal/social flourishing which is vital for your end goal of good works/justice. Sometimes this self-care requires solitude. Good “emotional development evolution” trial, persevere. We are here cheering for you, and we’ve all (at some point past present or future) had to contend with various demons. We believe in you.
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Thanks – Glad to offer what I can
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11/2/17, 5:42 PM
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Holy shit is Parker connected with fucking Wu-tang Clan?
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11/4/17, 4:22 PM
Shweta

In a highly tenuous way I guess – the company leasing his business supposedly was cofounded by the Ghostface Killah, but the latter doesn’t show up on the ground at all. Parker would love to talk to you about it, he knows the details – you should call him.
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I hope you’re doing well.
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Very exhausted here myself.
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1/23/18, 2:04 PM
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Hey shweta I’m in Chapel Hill. Call me when you get this.
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If you are busy don’t worry, but I am trying to do something unusual and benevolent, let’s call it a quest or a mission, and I could use some backup.
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5/10/19, 5:49 PM
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dawsongage.net

Dawson Gage Against the Machine – “The problem is not in the implementation or communication of the system, the flaw is the system itself.” –S.E.G.

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6/1/20, 11:11 AM
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6/12/20, 2:10 PM
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dawsongage.net/?p=936

“Ben David is Guilty”: Letter to the (entire) Office of the District Attorney, NC Prosecutorial 6 – www.dawsongage.net

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11/1/20, 5:11 PM
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Shweta I’m in Washington, DC, I cut off the ankle monitor on 15 October, my mother was trying to get me to “turn myself in”, but I am seeking political asylum from the State of North Carolina. Check the website. Hope y’all are well.
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dawsongage.net

www.dawsongage.net – “The problem is not in the implementation or communication of the system, the flaw is the system itself.” –S.E.G. / “Without knowing the force of words, it is impossible to know men.’ –Confucius (不知言、無以知人也

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Mar 5, 2024, 1:41 PM
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Hey Shweta how are you? Wanted to let you and Parker know I got out of jail.
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Mar 5, 2024, 4:01 PM
Shweta
Okay doing well thanks! Best to reach out to Parker directly/independently!
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Glad to hear you’re free and well.
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I spoke with Parker while I was in jail. Do I take you to mean you two separated?
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Nope, just do various things individually
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Parker may not always pick up but likely will see text messages more reliably
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Gotcha. Goodness this has been such an ordeal. I think I have the upper hand over the DA however.
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If I gotten out just a few days earlier in December, I would’ve been on the ballot today. The brothers on lockdown in Orange County were all shouting “Gage for Governor” throughout 2023.
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I’m sorry you’ve been going through a rough time with stuff there
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Try calling Parker soon?
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Mar 6, 2024, 10:31 AM
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Yes I will do that.

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BTW, your recent “Facebook journalism” has been stupendous. “Island of the Blue Dolphins” was a very important book for me. I read it during my difficult year of transition from Montessori school to public school, which was in many ways the beginning of my “critical education”. The edition you refer to with the intro by Lois Lowry did not exist back in 1998, but “The Giver” might have been the most significant book I read in my youth.
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Thank you, I appreciate it. I kind of keep it to myself and my friends list is very small, maybe only 60 or so native English speakers? Parker wouldn’t be happy about my political spiels so I keep it to myself that I document my thoughts here
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I should opt for better journaling platforms but it’s hard to focus with everything on my plate
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The childhood books were very meaningful – for all of us I imagine. It has been an interesting emotional experience starting to go back and read through them with my kids
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I find that a simple WordPress website is far superior to Facebook, since it is better to own your website than to use Mr. Zuckerberg’s, where views like yours about Israel (for instance) are regarded as “conspiracy theories”. While the “social media interactions” do have some value, it is better journalism and literature to pursue the independent voice. Starting my website at age 29 has put me in the running for the Nobel Prize precisely because I refused to collude with “publishers” and “platforms”. There was no other way to be a “communist writer in North Carolina”, and I didn’t want to abandon either communism or North Carolina.
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writing independently is a good idea. The social interaction/dynamic are draws to this particular site, but I agree
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You see, I have actually written several different books since I last saw you, but am forbidden to publish them in North Carolina, and even elsewhere in America, where the State would try to extradite me.
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When I say “Nobel prize”, I am thinking of Solzhenitsyn especially, but also Neruda. I think that writers around the world will sympathize with my cause. For instance…
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Are you familiar with the works of Arundathi Roy or Salman Rushdie? And the story of the latter’s persecution? There are eerie connections between my case and Rushdie’s book The Satanic Verses. The “domestic violence protective order” against me which began this nightmare was entered the same day as the Ayatollah’s fatwa against Rushdie. That is, 6 February.
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What I am thinking Shweta is that perhaps you could make a few phone calls for me to the organization called PEN. I would do it myself but have too much to do. Maybe take some time to read about “the Rushdie affair”.
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It’s a “writer’s organization” that defends free speech. That is the best way to get in touch with Salman Rushdie. Think “literary lifeline”. In fact I was acquainted with Rushdie’s good friend Martin Amis, and am versed in the works of his friends Tariq Ali and Arundathi Roy. To aid your efforts (and for your own enjoyment), here are some of the poems I wrote in jail last year.
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That’s great you’ve written books — Rushdie had a fatwa from Iran. I doubt that the US would try to persecute someone over a book about their beliefs and ideologies and even sociological/journalistic investigations, even if they’re communist or anti-establishment, unless the content is like Assange’s — which it couldn’t be as they aren’t classified intelligence material etc. The US relies on the passively suppressive power of “soft totalitarianism” to take care of resistance speech.
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“inverted totalitarianism” I mean
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It might also be helpful if you have an email address. I know this is quite a “mission”, but I suspect it might suit you. Take your time, but the situation is quite serious. It really isn’t safe for me in this jurisdiction, but if I leave I need someone to help me get asylum.
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I am extremely overloaded with my life right now
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I am behind even with necessary tasks of my own
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because I’m overwhelmed with everything on my plate
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I would help you with this mission if I had time
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It is in fact very much like Assange’s, only the secrets are State and not federal in nature. You’re right it does defy expectations.
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You could publish it and move out of the state
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once you are able to do so
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Or get out and then publish, yes. The question however is how this impacts the political situation in North Carolina. The revelations are in fact far more overwhelming than Snowden or Wikileaks, since they take the form of “literary art” and not just “leaked records”.
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I sent a flash drive full of papers to the DA’s office in Raleigh which implicate Attorney General Josh Stein. In fact the website I was arrested and jailed for in Orange County had the express purpose of criticizing Mr. Stein and stopping his campaign for Governor. The records of the case show this.
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If uncovering injustice, the positive democratic consequences of info transparency should outweigh any side effects of disclosure
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On what grounds did they arrest you for the website?
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Was it alleged libel or releasing classified info?
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I didn’t know there was that category of info at the state levle
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That it mentioned the names of Elizabeth Ross and her “trafficking partner” Omar Ruiz-Lopez. “Harassment” and “contact” have taken the place of “libel”, since people and the State find that “getting you arrested and prosecuted” is a better “remedy” than “suing for libel” ever was.
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Oh okay. The way political activist poets and artists have circumvented such consequences is through elliptical language. You could still identify the people you’re calling out over various things but identify them with poetic names or shortened names
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etc
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in your boom
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book
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Enough poetic plausible deniability to not be able to be charged with such things
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You’re right about that, I could have avoided it, but I was too desperate and passionate to be careful. It is not only one woman I love, but several; not only past “partners”, but “prospective” ones. I will not repeat my mistake, but the basic issue of suppression and censorship remains. You are right to think this is a radical new idea.
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In actions for “libel” in North Carolina, truth is a defense. But in actions for “stalking” and “domestic violence” there is no accepted defense. To this extent the statutes are very similar to “witchcraft statutes”. I was educated in Andover, MA where they hung witches in 1692, and my ancestor John Gage and his family were in the vicinity of Salem in the era proceeding the witch trials.
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*preceding
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I understand how we can all too easily succumb to the storms of feeling – of pain and hurt. And you’ve been through a lot with your losses.
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It’s a tricky place to be.
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Haven’t you already gone through the system for those charges?
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What does publishing the book have to do with that / the state attorney general?
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You have the right to poetically document your own history… If it involves other people, just somehow censor their names to protect their privafcy.
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Mar 6, 2024, 11:41 AM
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In short, it is the North Carolina Democratic Party and its judicial officials. They no longer have legislative power, but they cling to power in certain judicial offices, and Roy Cooper’s administration took this in a terrifying new direction. I’ve compared the situation elsewhere to the Hitler-Stalin pact: North Carolina politics has fallen into a “two party totalitarian spiral”. In fact the collapse of the Democrats was at the heart of my personal and political crisis at UNC. Think about it: there was no one we knew who was either interested or qualified to run for “high office”. Not to speak ill of our peers, but that is the reality: different priorities, different beliefs and commitments (or lack thereof). The exceptions were myself and Eve Marie Carson, and I suppose my brother. This relates to the way that “law school” became a requirement to “join the bar”. What is called “mental illness” is in fact this quality of “natural education” in either law or literature. Formal and institutional learning violently displaced the traditional ways, and the capitalists and tricksters of the older generations decided to smother the young. When we met in summer 2009 these crises were only beginning to emerge. For a while it seemed like the GOP were the bearers of a “new fascism”, but it has become clear since then that the Democrats are just as inclined, if not more so, to abandon constitutional law. In this context, mother and I occupy a position in the Party akin to Trotsky in the Soviet Union. Both her grandfathers were in the General Assembly and she remains a very powerful figure, but the Democrats in my county did not want me to be allowed to run for office. To some extent this resembles efforts to “suppress the left” by “right Democrats”, but in my case it is infinitely more extreme.
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I am going to go make a smoothie. I have an “appointment” to make at 1pm and it’s pouring rain. This has been fruitful, thank you Shweta.
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Aug 25, 2024, 5:25 PM
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https://on.soundcloud.com/XbhF6cpUH7BbmbSL7

The Mixtape for Anderson Clayton